Shopping Your Own Closet

About a month ago I decided to start a two-fold project:

1. PURGE.
2. Shop in my own closet for 1 month

30 days is coming to a close soon and while I haven’t put together 30 outfits (as I don’t have the need to get dressed up every day) I have still observed many changes over the past month that I’m excited to share with you!!

First and foremost: You can’t blame an outfit for your unhappiness with your body.

Oof. That’s tough for me to even say out loud. Because we have ALL been there. I was there for.. hmm.. let’s see, SIX+ YEARS?! Life was busy life-ing and I could not keep a consistent handle on my fitness, food was my favorite comfort blanket, and I had no motivation to make a change.

Now don’t get it twisted: I still loved to dress up and be cute during those 6 years of course, but I was painfully aware of my body at all times. Unless I was in PJ’s at home, at least 1 of my brain cells was hyper-focused on my body at all times. And worse, never fully confident in my own skin, regardless of how fire the ‘fit was. Fortunately, I’ve always had a decently healthy mindset around body image and I’ve never let it take over or ruin the rest of the beautiful things going on in life / used it as a reason to sit things out, etc. (Don’t worry–my demons just exist in other categories of life LOL)

At the end of the day, our size, shape, and the number on the scale does not define us, but it feels inaccurate to ignore that our fitness does color a lot of our experiences. At some point, I fully forgot what it felt like to be *genuinely* care free and kind to myself about my body. And now being in a place where I’ve been reminded how good that feels… it’s something I hope to never give up again. When you feel good in your skin, you are your own constant hype man. Getting dressed every day turns into a fun and creative process, instead of a dreaded and overwhelming process. I don’t want to harp on this long, as this is a post about our closets after all, but just a friendly reminder that you get to decide what size and shape that freedom exists at and you will never regret taking care of yourself–whatever that looks like to you. And best news yet: if you are in a season of change with your body, you can still shop in your own closet. Don’t wait to live your life. <3

That being said, if you’re like “nah babe, my body slays the house boots down… but I still don’t like what I own” then let’s keep this show on the road.

Purge first, then slowly replenish

You have to get the chaos out of the way before you can really assess and pivot if needed. So start there, then take your time replenishing any areas that might be lacking now. Two things to keep in mind as you purge:

1. Let the shit you’ve owned for a decade go, babe. There’s no reason that going out top from 2015 needs to take up valuable real estate and make you wonder why you don’t weigh what you did as a freshman in college?? That’s just plain unreasonable. Ditch it, sis!
2. Time to refresh your wardrobe with things that suit who you are now <3 Tastes change, needs change, bodies change… honor your own evolution and I promise getting dressed will be an entirely different experience.

If the idea of purging sounds super overwhelming, you are not alone. As a *professional purger* myself, I created a free guide detailing exactly how I purge: planning ahead, things to remember, my personal system for the actual purge, and more. If you need some assistance in this department, check that guide out here!

Quick Note: Why Capsule Closets are Bullshit

The internet has really tried to convince us in this “capsule closet” concept… and here’s why I’m calling bullshit:

Yes, pairing back your collection is bound to make getting dressed less overwhelming.. you’re essentially putting on a version of a uniform everyday? Love that for anyone it works for… but for most people that is just not practical.

The capsule closet also limits your color play drastically. It’s giving sad beige mom… (If you’ve never heard this term before, it’s basically exactly as it states. It’s a label for how society has become obsessed with neutral tones and virtually eliminated color, especially in areas where color is inherent & FUN — like kids’ rooms, toys, etc.) And in my personal opinion… in our CLOSETS, too.

While I have no qualms with what works for you, maybe your ideal closet is varying shades of white, tan, and black… I challenge you to reconsider and give playing with color a try. Life is full of it, as should our closets be.

And lastly, too many things change for a capsule closet to be realistic. Bodies change, styles change, and our every day needs change. I’m not always trying to wear my white button down classic tee to happy hour and my kids’ baseball game?? My ass gonna be in my favorite crusty WSU t-shirt and damn proud of it. Clothes exist to serve functional purpose first and foremost and as an expression of our personalities second. I don’t know about you–but I don’t know a SINGLE person who’s personality I would describe as beige.

Treating your Closet like a Store

Hear me out… (if you’re a normal human being who hates laundry) think about the current state of your closet. Got it? Hold onto that visual.

Okay, now imagine walking down the sidewalk of a beautiful outdoor lifestyle shopping center, seeing the sign of your favorite fashion retailer and practically running to their doors.

You open the door and find the store looks identical to the current state of your closet.

Jump scare anyone?? My ass is sprinting in the other direction in this scenario. It’s giving looted DAV.

Now, flip the script. Imagine looking into your closet and it looks like the mini version of your favorite storefront. Things are clean, in their correct home, labeled, and cohesive. Maybe it even smells nice?? Ahhhh… perfection.

While I don’t expect that anyone is going to keep their closet perfect 100% of the time, there is something to be said about making your closet SHOPPABLE.

Easy ways to make your closet shoppable:

• Keep things tidy (wow, groundbreaking)
• Store things in a way that makes it easy to look through them. For example, to free up hanging space & make my closet feel more shoppable, I moved my cotton t-shirts to a bin. Inside the bin they are folded and in a stack that is on it’s side so I can see every t-shirt at once. No digging around or wondering where that one WSU tee is, I can spot it the second I slide the bin out, reach in and neatly remove it, then be on my way.
• Don’t overfill your space. But you’ve purged… so this isn’t an issue, right? 😉
• Keep everything in the same closet/room/etc. The biggest lie some of us tell ourselves is that we’ll ever bother looking at the clothes we decided to put in the guest bedroom closet. Here’s the deal babe: out of sight, out of mind. Get your collection down to a manageable and store-able size.

My personal non-negotiables:

• Eliminate elements of chaos. Ie. Do you have 6 different styles of totes visible in your closet? Try investing in some matching totes / tubs / whatever storage containers it may be. This will create a totally different sense of calm and eliminate unnecessary distraction in your line of vision every day. The other thing: matching hangers. 42 different styles, types, and colors of hangers sends me into cardiac arrest. Granted, this is not *important* in the scheme of life and I recognize that. 🙂 I’m just saying, if you’re on a journey to create a stylized and adult feeling closet space, matching your tubes & hangers is the ultimate game changer.
• Matching FELT hangers. If you’re really looking to level up… might I suggest swapping all your hangers to matching felt hangers. Your clothes will never slip off the hanger again, sweaters wont get those stretch marks in the shoulders, and your closet will look like a retail store with this one simple change. I buy them in large packs on Amazon (50 for $24) and will never go back to plastic. I also use pant hangers for my jeans (which after purging is a whopping 3 pairs of jeans & 3 pairs of jean shorts, woohoo!!)

Now, Shop (in your own closet)!

Trust me, once you’ve cleared the way, this is when it starts getting fun.

In the beginning, it will likely be finding the motivation to get dressed that is the hardest part! You’ve spent however long now not enjoying the process, so the lethargy is totally understandable. But remember, if you purged properly, the closet you’re working with now is not the same one that used to weigh on you. So try to lean into the idea of it being a new experience!

You’ve found the motivation to get dressed, you’re staring at your clothes… what now? Just start. The first few days you might not put on outfits that absolutely blow you away, and that’s okay. You’re re-learning how to pair things and identifying your current style!

Start with a basic on the bottom: something super easy like jeans that actually fit you. If you don’t own any now… then you have my personal permission to go out and invest in a pair that FIT you and that you feel like an absolute baddie in. More on this at the end of this post…

Easy Styling Practice

Assuming you either currently own a classic bottom or have just become the proud new owner of some… woohoo! You’re ready to put together the rest of your first outfit.

I like to now either pick a shoe that inspires the outfit or pick the top that will dictate the rest of the fit. I like for these two to play off of each other. So whichever speaks to you, grab it. Then find the other piece to compliment it, ie. the shoes that work with your top or vice versa.

Once you’ve established those three pieces: classic bottoms, top, & shoes… now you’re cooking with gas.

Time to Accessorize

Now, think about your options:

• Belt – I’m usually a no-belt girly as my belt collection is lackluster. But there are plenty of times it is absolutely the move to add a polished feeling to your took!
• Jewelry – I typically keep this pretty consistent, I really only switch up my earrings & add or remove a watch here and there. But jewelry is a super easy way to add flare to an outfit or change up the vibe. Throw on a fun pair of overstated earrings on a simple outfit and suddenly you’re *chic*, layer some necklaces to add some grungy glam to any fit, strip everything away with only a pair of simple dainty earrings and you are the epitome of class, you name it–jewelry can do it!
• Jacket – Don’t overthink this — try a few on, if nothing is clicking, don’t force it or you’ll end up carrying it around hating your life.
• Handbag – Another incredibly easy way to spice up any outfit! Between Amazon and Target, we have access to virtually unlimited affordable handbag options, designer dupes, you name it! I love to use my handbag to add a pop of color to an otherwise monochromatic or neutral outfit.
• Hair Accessories: Headband, Scarf, Hat, etc. — …if you know me you know my trucker hat collection is out of control, so there’s nothing more to be said here really. 🙂

BADA-BING BADA-BOOM you’re STYLED babe!

Don’t forget the mirror selfie on your way out 😉

Going Forward

If you’re rewriting the script around getting dressed every day, then be patient. It will take a few times to get comfortable and find a groove. If this is your JAM, then get it and keep pushing the envelope! Regardless what your objective is–when we combine feeling good in our skin & clothes that actually fit us (style-wise, fit-wise, all of it)… then putting together an outfit becomes a chance to make a statement of who we are to the outside world. A chance to tap into the little girl in us who loves to play dress up. A chance to try new things and let our creativity reign free for a change!

I think a month was the perfect amount of time to really settle into what exists in my collection now and notice where the bare spots are. So don’t rush in to anything outside of like the classic jeans / jean short. Play with what you have, then after a month or so, you can start to slowly fill in the gaps if there are any.

Filling in the *essential* gaps:

Where to find jeans in person?

If you’re in the Wichita area, might I recommend Pink Saloon in the Waterfront. They carry great brands like Agolde, Mother, Frame, and Citizens of Humanity (my all time fave). If you go the investment route… be prepared for a $200-$220 tag on these bad boys. But this is why I love shopping Pink Saloon, they put things on sale pretty regularly, so if you’re lucky you can walk away with $200+ jeans for less than $150. Still an investment, I know, but girl math babe… you MADE money in that scenario!

If you’re looking for a mid-investment option, 10/10 recommend Nordstrom Rack. Be prepared to dig, but there’s some gems in there of the same brands I mentioned previously.

If you want the bare bones, you can’t go wrong with TJ Maxx. Get it girl, you can’t go wrong there. BUT, I have to say: it’s okay to invest in yourself. If you’ve never owned a nice pair of jeans and don’t plan on having any *major* body changes any time soon, sleep on it. There’s something about a perfect fitting, classic jean that will last for years… it’s tough to be beat. You know what’s best for you right now, so honor that above all else. I just know more than a few women who would gladly invest in quality for their children, spouses and friends… but rarely find themselves worth that same investment. This is a chance to practice prioritizing yourself if it suits you here.

Online Options

If you’re not interested in the in-person experience, I would recommend starting with Revolve. Their site is super easy to shop, they have great semi-annual sales, and their returns are simple and painless — 10/10 recommend for jeans.

My all time favorite jean (literally, I have multiple pairs from over the years at a variety of sizes): The “Daphne” Crop High Rise from Citizens of Humanity

My all time favorite jean shorts: The “Parker” Short from Agolde — I love these in both the “long” and regular version. The long is perfect… not long enough to feel granny, but not too short where you feel like you’re in an 18 year olds’ clothes. 🙂

Brands I’ve owned & love:

• Citizens of Humanity $$$
• 7 For All Mankind $$$
• Agolde $$$
• Levi’s $$
• Mother $$
• Frame $$
• Good American $

And last true “essential” that you might be long overdue on… a real bra that fits properly and is comfortable. Don’t get me started on how ridiculous I think the pricing is on women’s products, bra’s specifically, but this is the world we live in. If you’re in the market, as a I-need-all-the-support-I-can-get girly, let me suggest my all time favorite bra brand: Wacoal. You can shop them online, it’s also carried in Dillard’s (where I buy mine, so I can try on). Side note: I actually really enjoy the bra shopping experience at Dillard’s–never any other people there and they have a huge selection of quality bra brands. Just please, for the love of all that is good, don’t go to VS. <3